Madness
by Rozafunk
Summary: Hikaru gets mentally tortured by Kyoya where he becomes blinded with anger . Kaoru in the other hand gets into depression , will Hikaru be able to fix everything after being the reason to ruin them ? - BOYXBOY and lemon ,
1. Chapter 1

It's Saturday of November 15, 2013 . the weather is sort of cold and calm . some clouds would appear sometimes as the leaves start to fall . I love this month with every small detail.

My name is Kaoru Hitachiin , you can call me kao . I live with my identical twin brother Hikaru , in our little cabin , it is in the end of the city road. we can't live with noises as we are very artistic persons. Therefore we live in the forest where everything is simple and clear, where heartless and annoying humans never exist. We don't have a tv or a radio, not interested to know about all the problems in the world , we live peacefully here .Once you enter the cabin you'll notice the huge amount of books we have on the shelves , right beside them is a small round table ,on it there is a glass with an orange rose and another blue in it . Beside them there is a wooden stand with canvas , Hikaru likes to paint. in the other side of the cabin you'll find our bed with green covers and a small closet , in the wall there is an old stopped clock , never felt like fixing it , time really doesn't matter to us because we live in the present only , beside it there is a small round window . in the inside there is the bathroom and a super small kitchen that has all what we need. we spent out time reading and studying about the forest around us , the trees , the the animals , the bugs , the weather and the water . and we are satisfied with this , our soul is peaceful as we need nothing .

I opened the cabin door and went out to read my book while having coffee . I sat to my rocking chair under the oak trees while the sweet wind played with my brown hair . everything was nice . everything was perfect.

"kao I came back " I looked to my twin who just came back from the markets in the city road . " looks like you got lots of things "

He has put the pockets inside the cabin " Ooh well , they say this winter is going to be hard so yeah .." indeed it is ..

At night we had put rocks behind the wheels as we closed the door very well . the weather got worst , the wind hit the cabin so badly it was moving as the trees where making creepy noises . I hide myself under the bed covers while Hikaru was completing his painting so carelessly

" Hikaru…" I whispered

"yup?" ,

" do you think we should drive back to the city …"

" why would we ? " he said while picking the red color and put some in his brush , mixing it with blue

"the weather is getting worst .."

"pffft it's not like the first winter we spend here" as he finished his sentence a wild thunder has hit a tree in the place nearby cause we heard a harsh falling voice

" Hikaru .. what if that tree is burning right now and the fire reaches us !"

he turns and look at me "kaoru ! stop nagging , we are not leaving and nothing bad is going to happen just relax , jesus.. how much of a cry baby you can be .."

" what! Shut up , I am not a cry baby .. it's just that I am worried.."

the wind hit us harder the cabin moved a little , I heard one of the rocks we placed slipping down the hill " Hikaru ! we are going to—" I couldn't finish my sentence , the cabin moved to the back , we were falling !

Hikaru left what he was doing and went to the top , I heard him putting the keys on and started driving "HOLY SHIT ! " he swears , I left the bed , brought the cover with me and walked carefully towards Hikaru ..once he notices me he gives me his hand and so I take it , he was driving very fast . I sat beside him

" fuck it , it's worst than I thought this time " he drives to the high way "yeah .. " I look to the sky that was lighting with thunder and to the rain that is hitting the glass so badly .

I brought the blanket and put it on Hikaru's lap " thanks bro" I smiled to him . he drove for a long time , still we didn't reach the city .

"HIKARU WATCH OUT !" there was something laying in the street ! he drove to the left then to the right then stopped beside the street

" what the fuck was that!" he opened the window to check it out"it's a cow corpse..someone should take care of this shit " he kept driving after that

"hika.. there is a house in the maintain , do you think we can spend the night there ?"

" well yeah I guess , let's check it out " we parked beside the house and went out of the cabin .

knocked on the door couple of times but nobody opened "seems like it's empty " I said

"HELLOOOO, is anybody here?" Hikaru shouted out load

"let's leave already "

I took his hand "hika..?" the door suddenly got opened and a guy in 20s appeared "hello sir , we are travelers and we are wondering if we can stay here for tonight " Hikaru spoke

"well yeah sure , come in , it's a hotel after all .. but I didn't expect anyone to come tonight " he opened the light as we entered the house , I refused to let go of hikaru's hand , I really didn't feel comfortable about this place and I think Hikaru too

" so you guys are twins ?" said the guy

" yes , I am Hikaru and this is kaoru " the guy looked at me

" you can call me Kyoya" I hid behind Hikaru , the look he gave me was cold and evil "kao..?"

" I need you to give me your IDs and sign here , it's 300$ for the night " Kyoya said and Hikaru agreed

" wait a second , these are two separated rooms " hikaru said

"yes we only have those "

" ah ..give me a second .." Hikaru took me away from the guy so we were standing beside the door again

" Hikaru I'd rather sleep in the cabin with you than sleep alone in this place"

" I know I know . but we don't have any choice okay , we can't just rescue our life and back to the cabin , it's thunder out there "

"then let's take a room and share the bed "

" no we can't share the bed , it's meant for one person . it won't fit " Hikaru said

"but..hika.." he captures my face and fondled my cheeks " listen to me , it's gonna be okay , it's only for one night then we'll leave this place and never come back ..okay kaoru? I promise it's gonna be fine , it's more safe here than going out again " I listened to what he was saying it's just that I don't feel fine about it . I don't want to sleep alone here

" alright then ?" he asked . I looked to his eyes " hey don't give me this look , I said it's gonna be fine " I didn't say anything in return , he walked to Kyoya and signed the papers

"thank you , here are your keys , enjoy "

" thanks. " Hikaru gave me my key as we walked inside the halls .

It was so calm here and the lights weren't strong . my room's number was 13 and hikaru's 14 . we stood beside the doors "okay so ..this is the first night in 3 years we gonna sleep separated , right kaoru" he said

" yeah.." I said as I opened the door and went in .

" okay I'll put you to bed " .

" Hikaru , it's fine " I said as I looked around myself .it's a medium side room , the bed isn't big and there is a closet beside . what I noticed is there wasn't a window .

" why there is no window ?" I asked

" I don't know , maybe there is another hall or something behind the wall " hika said .

I sat on the bed and took my shoes off "hika you may leave "

" umm..okay then " he stood up , put his hands around my shoulders for a hug , I did the same .

for some reason this hug was longer than usual .

after some time we separated " have nice dreams , and lock the door "

" you too kaoru " he left the room , opened his door and entered , locked it too . I did the same . ran to the bed and buried myself under the covers , I actually left the lights opened . I brought the pillow and hugged it. This night can't be worst…

I spent the longest time trying to fall asleep but that was impossible , not without Hikaru .

I took a breath and decided to knock on Hikaru's room , don't mind if I sleep on the floor just not alone . so i brought my pillow and opened my room's door , looked out to the empty corridor and left the room , I closed the door and walked to hikaru's . suddenly I saw a shadow coming towards me .

I ran to Hikaru and knocked on his door"hika open up .! hikaru!" the shadow kept coming closer .

hikaru's door suddenly got opened , I threw myself to my brother's chest as he brought me in and closed the door

" dammit kaoru you scared the shit out of me " I refused to let go so he fondled my hair and hugged me " there was someone out there walking close to me , I saw his shadow coming closer " hikaru took my hand and lead me to the bed " it could be someone living here , it's a hotel , or that Kyoya guy" he brought the covers on us

" mhm, so you couldn't sleep too Hikaru?" I murmured to the pillow

" not really , I think I am so used to your warming beside me " the top of his nose touched mine as he closed his eyes, he stopped and brought me to a hug .

for some weird reason I felt like Hikaru wanted to kiss me then he changed his mind so I came closer and pressed my lips to his cheek and then hid my face on his shoulder , " good night hika "

" night kaoru" . the bed was small so if one of us moves he is going to fall down , therefore we slept hugging .

I suddenly woke up cause i felt coldness . Hikaru wasn't there "hika? " he is not in the room anymore . "where is he.."

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**thanks for reading , Wait for the next chapter i'll upload it soon , and please leave reviews :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hikaru POV**

I made the worst decision in my life by agreeing to spend the night in this hotel.

Between the silence and kaoru's breath my thoughts were getting wilder. To live as travelers were the reason we decided to leave our rich family , to seek other places , other lives , other souls . even so we belong deeply to ourselves . to be silent and listen. have you recognized your madness and do you admit it? Have you noticed that all your foundations are completely mired in madness? Do you not want to recognize your madness and welcome it in a friendly manner? You wanted to accept everything . accept your blackness.

I slipped my hand under his chin gently . the desire that I am fighting day by day was getting harder . when did all this start you may wonder . he's the first person I want to look at when I wake up in the morning ,and the only one I want to kiss good night . because the first time I saw these hands touching someone else , I couldn't imagine letting him go . I couldn't imagine not be able to hold them anymore . but mainly when you love someone as much as I love him . getting married is the only thing left to do . in my case that was impossible . I took him away and left everything to live out own journey together without anyone else . I am madly in love with kaoru . and for you to find it strange is normal , to me that was the case. To love him but not be able to tell him . how ugly this can be ? I wouldn't want to be rejected from the only person I am still alive for. I can read his as a book and I know all his reactions . at this point if kaoru knew this , he'd run away with a broken heart and will cry out his eyes never wanting to come back to me again . still I couldn't stop myself from wanting him . it is happening now and I am touching him when he is sleeping , slipped my hand between his legs and touched him in his very sleeping part "unn..no..s..stop.." he whispered , this night , I died just a little when he was in the middle of his sentence and I knew where it was going , I didn't want to hear the rest . Kaoru would never want me in fact. I left the bed slowly. covered him very well . I pressed a kiss on his forehead then down to his light pink cheek . I took a glance to his strawberry so kissable lips that where taboo for me to kiss, me from all the people in the planet.

God .

I decided to leave the room . I needed some fresh air and this place doesn't even have windows . I went out the room to the corridor and went to the reception where I signed the papers first . right when I got there I noticed that it was an empty hall with some chairs beside the walls . still I found not a window, this is strange , because when we first got here I remember noticing windows as any normal building there is.

In my eye corner I noticed a lighten room in the next corridor "who might be awake now.." I walked there . doors from both sides and red carpets under my feet , once I got there I stood behind the door which was opened slightly to listen to the talk that was coming from the inside.

" I saw it within him … we just need him to get it all out , to feel the need for seeking a revenge , that's what I mean ! and you know it ! you know how to do that ! by all the human physiological studies that you have made ! and they are the only two that came to us by their desire ! wasn't that the condition ! " that was Kyoya's voice and by what I heard , I am afraid he is talking about me and kaoru " I suggest we kill the younger one . the older seems to have more anger within him , that's gonna be way useful to get it out of him " another man said

by hearing that , my whole body was shaking . I slowly got away from the door and ran to get kaoru out of this place ! I ran between corridors , terrified and losing breath . I got to the room just to find the door wild opened , I looked inside the room and kaoru wasn't there ! "k..kaoru.." tears fill my eyes as I looked to around me for a sign, I opened his room which was empty as mine , I ran as a crazy man in the corridor searching for my twin brother , my heart almost skipped a beat "please god.." I whispered while looking around for him . I didn't want to scream his name so they wouldn't hear us . I kept running , once I went to the left I crushed on something and fell down to the floor " ahh.." I looked up just to find Kyoya staring at me " so… you heard everything didn't you ? Hikaru hitachiin " I lost my breath . I wanted to get up but he kicked me by his leg so I fell down again , this pain wasn't a thing to the pain I felt in my heart , I was speechless I couldn't say a word . is this the time me and kaoru going to separate for ever . suddenly two strong huge men appeared behind me and one of them was holding kaoru " put me down ! " he was screaming on that man's shoulder " k..kaoru.." I said , he stopped screaming and looked at me "haa…hikaru " his eyes fill with tears as he sobbed " put him down" once came Kyoya older that man put kaoru down , he ran to me and fill in the ground beside me , I brought him close to my chest as he locked his hands around me , he was shivering and sobbing , his breath was fast . I didn't know what to say , I didn't know what to do to help us . I just felt useless , the only thing I could do is hugging him so close to me as tears ran down my eyes too . I moved them , didn't want kaoru to see me like this , not now . I gotta find a way to get out of this before my brother get harmed " hika…don't you ever leave me… " I founded his back , but actually the words couldn't leave my mouth , how can I tell him it's gonna be okay when I am not sure myself , when I am scared as hell myself . " my my , how adorable this is" Kyoya said as leaning down to us , he touched Kaoru's hair , I madly slapped his hand " don't you dare touching him " I said " oh really Hikaru? , I wouldn't dare in your place " he looked at his men " get both of them to my room , now" as so one has pushed kaoru away from me while the other pointed a gun to my head " move " he order and so I did , I didn't remove my eyes from Kaoru's eyes , it kills me to see him this way , it kills me twice to know that I am the reason of all this , I am the one who decided to stay here for tonight …"I am sorry " I whispered between my own tears . would they kill him … my only reason to stay alive . my only love and happiness .. my soul mate..

Suddenly Kyoya stood beside the biggest door in the place and opened it " get them in , tai Hikaru to the chair and keep pointing the gun to his head " we entered and so they did " Noo..hikaru … don't harm him , don't do this to him please …Hikaru.." kaoru screamed "shush shush " Kyoya said while touching his cheeks " we are not going to harm him , we are only going to play a little game together and Hikaru is going to watch only " Kyoya said while looking back to me with his evil sick cold smile and his glasses . he carried kaoru between his arms " put me down !" kaoru screamed " listen up kaoru , do you want me to kill your brother?" Kyoya asked him as the man behind me pressed the gun to my head "NO! PLEASE DON'T !HIKAARUU" kaoru screamed as more tears ran out his sweet golden eyes " then I'd need you to calm down and do what I order " yea..yeah.." Kyoya walked to the huge bed in the middle of the room .. no…no …no ..he is not….he can't.."DON'T YOU DARE TOUCHING HIM DON'T YOU FUCKING PUT A FINGER ON HIM , I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU , YOU BASTARD PIECE OF SHIT !" I screamed out with all my strength "shut up boy" the man beside me said as he moved the gun from my head to my cheek " unless you want me to finish you " he completed , I mentally fell down . I looked up to kaoru "don't…don't accept it kao… I'd rather die than…seeing this ..AAAH" I screamed out ! I can't handle this . what the hell is this ! " I can't let them kill you…I am sorry Hikaru " kaoru said in his broken tone .. as he laid down to the bed . I looked down to the floor , didn't want to see this "OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES AND LOOK " the man behind me pushed my hair back and got my head up ,he pressed the gun to my left eye " open up , NOW" I couldn't but to do so ." I opened my eyes as Kyoya was getting ready to do whatever he wants to my kaoru , while I am here looking at this , being killed from the inside , fell with anger and hate . kaoru refused to look at me . he is ashamed he is shy and scared , he's being bullied , he's going to lose everything to Kyoya , his pride .. all cause of my fucking useless so called a life I will completely die tonight . at this moment I hopped the thunder that I was running out from , hits me with all its strength and turns me to ashes .

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**Thanks for reading , please wait for the next chapter , oh and don't forget to leave reviews**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hikaru POV**

"stop…stop this .." I whispered under my breath , seeing this bastard thrusting in my twin like that . with every thrust I felt like my soul is being stabbed . my red eyes made it hard to see but I couldn't not feel him pain , his broken heart . how needed and feckless he is . he hide his face with his hands but his sobbing was too load to be hidden . the anger inside me increased . from the inside I felt like a monster ready to kill that motherfucking Kyoya and his men . this is the worst torture a human can have . seeing the closest person to you getting harmed and abused in front of your eyes still you are helpless "DO YOU SEE THAT HIKARU? DO YOU . . . SEE…" Kyoya said to me while pushing harder in kaoru . I looked at him without saying anything . the look in my eyes was enough for him to get it . I'll kill him , I'll avenge kaoru . I'll do worst to him and his family , just wait till I get out of here , if by any chance.

My breath got harder I thought I am going to have a heart attack . the bastard suddenly got out of kaoru , all while looking at me , he carried him and walked away " where the hell are you taking him ! kaoru ! kao!" . kaoru was so tiered to say anything or even to raise his head , he was sweaty and his breath was hard . when Kyoya carried him , he opened his eyes and looked at me from that bastards shoulder "hika… " his eyes were full of tears and red , with a very cold look in them . he sent me a light kiss in the air. "kao.." My heart shattered to a thousand piece. Kyoya entered a door that was inside the room . I heard the water coming from there , it must be a bathroom . after awhile I heard kaoru moaning again .."STOP IT! STOP HURTING HIM ! I WILL KILL YOU , I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL YOU ALL ! EVERY LAST ONE OF YOUR FAMILY ! EVERY PERSON THAT YOU EVER CARED ABOUT ! DO YOU HEAR ME KYOYA ! I PROMIS TO FINISH YOU !" I screamed my lungs out . suddenly kaoru screamed out as Kyoya did " that was amazing " I heard him saying , then he went out of the bathroom alone , without kaoru "let's leave now . our job is over " he said , came closer to me and put a knife on my lap. I spit on his face "I'll kill you .." I said to him in anger . he smiled to me and left the place with his men . "Kaoruuuu! " I screamed but he didn't answer . I pushed myself to ground in a hurry , tried to hold the knife and cut the ropes around me . "Kaoru do you hear me ? kaoru are you alright ! I am coming ! , please hold on !" I hold the knife finally and cut the ropes. I ran to the bathroom to find kaoru setting in the tub with the water falling on him , he was hugging himself and crying . I walked to him , I entered the tub even thought I am still fully dressed , I brought him to me , I hugged him close to me . he hid himself on my chest as he sobbed loudly , I cried too . my tears where mixed with the shower water , I didn't know how to put all this together . I failed in protecting him " I am sorry.. forgive me kaoru , forgive me " I hugged him as we would never separate . kaoru didn't speak much that night .. and not any sooner .

**Kaoru POV**

After that night . my desire to live …has gone .

Wrapped my weak arms around my twin who was feeling anger and guilt for what happened. he is blinded by revenge . and I am flying away , my body is here and yet I still can't move . but spiritually I was damaged , wanted to die all alone with my shameful body . I wanted to leave for good. But I can't .

Leaving Hikaru like this . he'll be killed by guilt "hika..none of this .. none of what happened is your fault" he was weeping to me . if something , my pain is his pain . everything happened to me was ten times harder for him . he saw it and he felt it . yes it was done to me but he was the one who got hurt harder. "oh god…yes it was , I failed . I couldn't protect you , I couldn't do anything . I was there still I was helpless …aah kao..forgive me..I .." he wept . I needed to be stronger , if not for my poor self then to my twin brother. " it's not your fault and even thought I forgive you Hikaru " I stood up , totally naked . pain is killing my lower half of body . "unn" I moaned as I hold the sink in that bathroom and tried to leave the tube . I looked to Hikaru who was completely wet . his clothes and hair . his tears were mixed with water still I couldn't see his eyes , his hair was covering them . I touched his shoulder "it's okay hika .. I am fine now" his breathing was hard . he stood up slowly , left the tube . "don't lie to me .. show out all of your feelings kaoru…you don't have to do this to yourself just so I won't collapse...this is horrible.. scream it out .." he looked miserable . more than me . and showing my feeling the way he means .." I think I am so weak and destroyed now to scream anything out hikaru… I think I've ..cried enough .. " I said , Hikaru brought the long towel that was in there and put it around me . he covered my shameful body as he brought me to a hug " I promise you dear brother… to kill that motherfucker and bring you his head…I won't rest till I see him burning for what he did to you" he murmured to me "hika… don't . I don't know their reason to do that and I don't know how they let us even alive so … please don't risk your life with these bastards Hikaru" I know it wouldn't work and I know he always does what he wants . I tried to walk out of the bathroom but I couldn't , I moaned in pain ."kao ,I'll carry you" thank god I was lighter than Hikaru by 5 kgs. We entered the room , once I looked to the bed I felt like I am going to puke , I hid my face to hikaru's neck , more tears came out . Hikaru lent down and picked up my clothes as we left this room back to the corridor and back to hikaru's room " we are all alone in this place, these bastards have left . " Hikaru said , all this didn't make sense to me . Hikaru is angry as shit so he was out of his logic . we entered hikaru's room as he put me to the bed "hika.. you better change or..you'd catch a cold.." I said weakly to him as he brought the covers on me "I'll be fine " he whispered as he took my hands and pressed a kiss on my forehead . I closed my eyes , I was too exhausted . I knew Hikaru is going to always be by my side so I allowed myself to sleep this time.

**Hikaru POV**

I took my clothes off and covered myself with the blanket on kaoru's room , I sat beside the bed on the floor , mentally sick . my feelings toward kaoru has somehow ..changed. after what happened, the love feelings I had towards him has somehow disappeared . it's not his fault for that . I think it's me . I wanted kaoru all for myself and once I saw someone else having sex with him , my desire has gone . it's not that I would ever love him less than how I do now . it's that the next step that I always was dreaming to have with him has been stolen in front of my eyes. I promised myself to revenge badly and that's all I wanted to do right now.

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**thanks for reading :)) please leave reviews **

**i'll upload soon **


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